HAZBIN HOTEL - Hell's Greatest Dad

Haha, looks like you could use some help

From the big boss of Hell himself

Check out daddy's glowing reviews on Yelp

(Five stars! Flawless! Greater than great!)


Oh, with the punch of a pentagram

I wap-bam-boom, alakazam

Usually, I charge a sacrificial lamb

But you get the family rate


Who needs a busboy, now that you've got the chef

Michelin-tasting menu, free à la carte

I'll rig the game for you because I'm the ref

Champagne fountains, caviar mountains, that's just to start!


Who's been here since day one?

Who's been faithful as a nun?

Makes you chuckle with an old-timey pun

Your executive producer


I'm your guy, your day-to-day

Your chum, your steadfast hotelier

Remember when I fixed that clog today

(I was stuck, thank you sir!)